Cite this article as: Aliyu, F. N., Garko, A. U., &Ayegoro, R. A. (2025). An exophoric analysis on language use of divorced women in Kwami Local Government Area. Sokoto Journal of Linguistics and Communication Studies (SOJOLICS), 1(1), 108–116. www.doi.org/10.36349/sojolics.2025.v01i01.014
AN
EXOPHORIC ANALYSIS ON LANGUAGE USE OF DIVORCED WOMEN IN KWAMI LOCAL GOVERNMENT
AREA
By
Aliyu,
Faith Nkeri
Department
of Languages and Linguistics, Gombe State University
&
Abdullahi
Usman Garko
Department
of Languages and Linguistics, Gombe State University
&
Ayegoro,
Racheal Adesewa
Department
of Linguistics, University of Ilesa, Osun State
Abstract
The
work titled “An Exophoric Analysis on Language Use of Divorced Women in
Kwami Local Government Area of Gombe State” aims to examine the
socio-cultural and religious factors influencing language use in divorce, and
to explore the perceptions and attitudes of community members toward the use of
language in divorce in Kwami LGA of Gombe State. The study adopts a qualitative
research design, rooted in discourse analysis, to explore how divorced women in
the Kwami LGA area use exophoric references in narrating their divorce
experiences. Qualitative methods are best suited for investigating language use
in real-life contexts because they prioritize depth, meaning, and
interpretation over numerical generalizations (Creswell, 2013). The frameworks
such as Brown and Levinson’s Politeness Theory, Speech Act Theory, and Critical
Discourse Analysis (CDA) were adopted in the research and integrated into
divorce discourse research in the Nigerian context. The findings show that
exophoric referencing is not merely a linguistic phenomenon but a deeply
cultural and pragmatic resource. Through exophora, divorced women in Kwami
anchor their personal narratives in shared religious, cultural, and communal
frameworks, thereby legitimizing their voices and navigating the stigma of
marital dissolution. The research recommends
further anaphoric research in the related field.
Keywords: Divorce discourse, Divorce discourse, Language use,
Divorced women, Socio-cultural context
1.
Introduction
Divorce
and the inappropriate use of language in its discussion have become a growing
social phenomenon worldwide. The sanctity of marriage in many societies is
under pressure due to socio-cultural, economic, religious, and psychological
factors. In Nigeria, divorce rates have gradually risen, with some regions,
including Gombe State in northeastern Nigeria, showing more pronounced trends.
Kwami area in Gombe State has emerged as a significant site for studying
divorce discourse. Understanding the patterns, causes, and implications of
divorce requires an in-depth exploration from both linguistic and sociological
perspectives (Fairclough, 1992).
In
traditional African society, marriage is more than a union between individuals;
it connects families, communities, and lineages (Adebayo, 2020). Consequently,
divorce is often seen as a disruption of social harmony and stability. In Gombe
State, where Islamic beliefs dominate, divorce (ṭalāq) is lawful but socially
discouraged, intended as a last resort. Despite this, rising divorce rates
suggest that social and cultural restraints are weakening.
This
study examines how individuals and institutions in Kwami use language to
discuss divorce. Qualitative methods such as interviews, focus groups, and
textual analysis are employed to uncover discursive strategies used to justify,
resist, or critique marital breakdowns. Common expressions such as “she could
not keep her home” or “divorce is better than death in silence” reveal the
culturally entrenched narratives shaping perceptions of divorce.
2.
Literature Review
2.1
Concept of Discourse and Discourse Analysis
Discourse
refers to the use of language in texts and contexts to construct meaning,
identity, and social relationships. Fairclough (1992) emphasizes that discourse
is a social practice reflecting and reproducing power relations. Discourse
analysis is a qualitative approach to study language in use, focusing on social
actions, attitudes, and reality construction. In this study, discourse analysis
is applied to examine how individuals involved in or affected by divorce in
Kwami use language in legal, religious, and interpersonal contexts, revealing
social norms, gender roles, and power dynamics.
2.2
Language and Divorce
Language
plays a key role in expressing emotions, negotiating blame, defending actions,
and constructing identity during divorce. Divorce discourse is often
emotionally charged and influenced by religious and cultural values (Tannen,
1990). In Gombe State, Islamic and traditional norms shape how divorce is
discussed. Euphemisms, metaphors, and indirect speech are commonly used to
soften the impact of marital breakdowns (Yusuf, 2017). Gender differences in
language use are evident: women often appeal to communal values and emotional
experiences, while men may focus on authority and economic concerns.
2.3
Sociocultural Context of Divorce in Northern Nigeria
Marriage
in Northern Nigeria is highly valued and strongly linked to religious and
traditional expectations. Divorce, though permitted in Islam, is socially
discouraged and stigmatized, particularly for women. Terms like sakinaure (divorce)
or ƙorafi (complaint/petition) carry significant cultural and
emotional meaning. Traditional leaders, religious scholars, and family elders
influence the discourse, assigning blame, promoting reconciliation, or
reinforcing gender norms (Musa & Aisha, 2023). Understanding these
sociocultural influences is essential for analyzing divorce language in Kwami
LGA of Gombe State.
2.4
Pragmatic Features in Divorce Discourse
Pragmatics
studies language use in context beyond literal meaning. In divorce discourse,
speakers perform speech acts such as accusing, defending, apologizing, or
denying (Austin, 1962; Searle, 1969). Common pragmatic features include:
1. Face-threatening acts
(FTAs), such as accusations or blame.
2. Politeness strategies to
mitigate FTAs.
3. Metaphors and euphemisms
to soften sensitive issues.
4. Indirect speech and
hedging to avoid con-frontation.
5. In Kwami,
where respect and face-saving are highly valued, these pragmatic choices shape
both private and public discourse around divorce.
3.
Methodology
This
study adopts a qualitative research design, rooted in discourse analysis, to
explore how divorced women in Kwami town Area by the use of exophoric
references in narrating their divorce experiences. Qualitative methods are best
suited for investigating language use in real-life contexts because they
prioritize depth, meaning, and interpretation over numerical generalizations
(Creswell 2013).
The
population of this study consists of divorced women residing in Kwami. Kwami is
a type of community with a strong Islamic cultural background where divorce is
both socially significant and linguistically sensitive. Women in this area
often experience divorce within religious, cultural, and extended family
frameworks, making their narratives a rich source of data for exophoric
analysis.
The
sample of this study comprises six divorced women drawn from different wards
within Kwami LGA. The choice of participants is based on the need for rich,
diverse, and authentic accounts of divorce experiences.
Semi-structured
interviews are flexible; they provide guiding questions while allowing
participants to narrate freely in their own words (Kvale&Brinkmann, 2009).
This structure is particularly useful for studying exophoric references, as it
enables the researcher to observe spontaneous linguistic patterns.
Sample
guiding questions include:
i. Can you narrate what led
to your divorce?
ii. How do you usually
describe your ex-husband when talking about him?
iii. What words or expressions
do you use when referring to the place or events surrounding your divorce?
iv. When discussing your
divorce with others, what terms do you use to point to specific people or
issues involved?
Data
collection will involve face-to-face interviews with the selected participants.
Interviews will be conducted in the participants’ preferred language (Hausa,
Fulfulde, or English), and responses will be recorded using an audio recorder,
with participants’ consent.
Each
interview is expected to last between 30 to 45 minutes. After each session, the
researcher will transcribe the recordings verbatim, ensuring that exophoric
references are carefully preserved for later analysis. The researcher will also
take field notes to capture non-verbal cues, contextual references, and
emotional tones that may contribute to the interpretation of exophoric usage.
The
data will be analyzed using discourse analysis, focusing on the identification
and categorization of exophoric references in participants’ narratives. The
analysis will proceed in the following steps:
4.
Data Presentation and Analysis
The
section presents and analyzes the data collected from six interviews conducted
with women in Kwami local Government Area ofGombe State. The purpose of these
interviews was to examine how women employ exophoric references in their
discourse, and to uncover the pragmatic and cultural implications of such
usage. Unlike earlier chapters that provided theoretical grounding and
literature review, this chapter focuses on the voices of the participants
themselves, interpreting their speech in light of the study’s objectives.Each
interview is discussed individually in order to capture the unique linguistic
choices, contextual dynamics, and personal experiences of the respondents. For
every participant, the analysis highlights patterns of exophoric referencing—whether
personal, spatial, temporal, or event-based—while also linking these patterns
to pragmatic functions such as identity construction, politeness, and social
positioning.
4.1
Excerpt 1
“His
mother,” “his younger siblings,” “my father,” “Umar” → These require external cultural knowledge of family
hierarchies in Hausa Muslim settings, where in-laws play powerful roles in
shaping marital dynamics.
She
narrates her lived experience of a two-decade marriage filled with phases of
affection, betrayal, abuse, and eventual liberation. Initially, her
relationship with her husband was loving and peaceful, despite the silent
disapproval of her in-laws, particularly his mother. She supported her family
financially, emotionally, and domestically, often concealing her sacrifices.
However, her husband gradually became abusive, both physically and emotionally,
leading to a devastating betrayal when he secretly married another woman. After
years of enduring mistreatment, Amina sought legal redress, gaining custody of
her children and her freedom. For her, divorce became a pathway to peace and
self-discovery rather than despair.
Analysis
of Exophoric References
Her
narration is rich in exophoric references—pointing outside the text to
shared cultural, social, and religious contexts.
Personal
Exophoric References:
“His
mother,” “his younger siblings,” “my father,” “Umar” → these require external cultural knowledge of family
hierarchies in Hausa Muslim settings, where in-laws play powerful roles in
shaping marital dynamics.
The
husband’s statement “Aljannankinatafinkafana” (“Your Paradise
lies beneath my feet”) is a powerful cultural-religious exophora. It draws upon
Islamic teachings about wives’ obedience and positions himself as the gateway
to her spiritual success.
Spatial
Exophoric References:
“Whenever
he went to visit his parents, he would return looking sad” (“dukrandaya je gaishe da mahaifansazaidawojikinsa a
sanyaye”) points to the parental home as a symbolic space of conflict.
“We
finally moved into our new house” (“dagakarshemunkomasabongidanmu”)
indexes a new physical and emotional stage of the marriage, marking a turning
point in the story.
Temporal
Exophoric References:
“We
stayed together for eleven years,” (“shekarunmugomashadayamuna tare”) “On 5th
September 2025, it became exactly one year since I separated” (“biyargawatansatumba, yazamashekaradayadai-dai da
rabuwan mu ke nan”) → These chronological markers situate her suffering and
freedom in concrete lived time, making the narrative deeply personal and
verifiable.
Her
story challenges the stereotype of women as silent victims by demonstrating how
Hausa women can mobilize cultural, religious, and legal resources to resist
oppression. At the same time, it illustrates how exophoric
references serve as cultural markers of power (e.g., Islamic idioms,
kinship terms, festival practices), encoding broader gender struggles within
individual narratives.
4.2
Excerpt 2
“my
parents’ house became like mine” (“sai
da gidaniyayenayazamakamargidanmijina”)
She
recounts her painful experience as a second wife (amarya) to Khalid, who was
already married. Their love at the beginning quickly faded after marriage, as
Khalid began maltreating her. She endured neglect, poor feeding, and emotional
abuse, often relying on her parental home for support. When she delivered her
child, her husband offered little or no assistance, even taking food meant for
her and giving it to his first wife (uwargida). Matters worsened when she
returned from her parents’ house to discover that he had sold all her
belongings, including her clothes and those of her baby.
Although
he delayed the divorce for about two years, claiming he still loved her, his
actions showed otherwise. She felt that he was under the control of his first
wife and that his interest in marrying her was for selfish material gain.
Eventually, after court involvement, she received her divorce. She now views
the separation as liberation and expresses happiness at her freedom, stressing
that she would never remarry him nor wish such a man upon anyone else.
Analysis
of Exophoric References
Personal
Exophora:
“uwargida”
(first wife) → requires cultural
knowledge of Hausa polygynous structures where the first wife is usually
dominant.
“Abba”
(father) → child’s repeated reference
to the absent father highlights familial expectations and the pain of
abandonment.
Mentions
of parents and family → exophoric links to
the extended kinship system that often mediates marital disputes.
Spatial
Exophora:
“my
parents’ house became like mine” (“sai
da gidaniyayenayazamakamargidanmijina”) → signals parental home as a safe
refuge in Hausa marital culture.
“on
getting there I was shocked… he sold everything in the house” → situates betrayal in the domestic space, which
culturally should be a woman’s security.
Temporal
Exophora:
“just
two months… the rest is going back and forth” → situates her unstable marital stay in concrete timeframes.
“after
2–3 years of my stay at home” (“bayanshekarubiyuzuwauku
da nayinazamangida”) → shows the prolonged waiting period before divorce was
finalized.
Her
exophoric references to uwargida, naming ceremonies, and maternal
practices further affirm that Hausa cultural and religious markers play a
central role in shaping marital expectations and gender roles. Yet, Hauwa’s
rejection of her ex-husband and refusal to reconcile marks a significant
departure from earlier patterns of female submission.
4.3
Excerpt 3
“his
mum”, “his younger siblings”,
and “his two kids” → point to extended family pressures,
revealing polygamous traces in Kabir’s life.
“my
mum made me to accept him” →
underscores parental influence in Hausa marital choices.
Khadija,
from Kwami, narrates her painful marriage to Kabir, a man she initially
believed to be a soldier. After marriage, she discovered that he had been
dismissed from service, leaving him unemployed. Although their relationship
started with love, his behavior quickly deteriorated, especially when she
became pregnant. Kabir lied about his marital past, claiming to be a widower,
only for Khadija to later discover that he was divorced and had two children
with his former wife.
Their
domestic situation worsened when their landlord evicted them, forcing Khadija
to live in her mother-in-law’s cramped one-bedroom house. Later, Kabir rented
another house, but to her shock, all her bridal belongings—furniture, kitchen
items, washing machine—were gone. He had sold them without her consent, leaving
only a mattress in the house. When questioned, he insulted, abused, and
physically assaulted her.
Kabir
also pursued other women openly and abandoned her emotionally and financially
during her pregnancy. His neglect was evident when he disappeared to Niger
State after she filed for separation in court, avoiding accountability. During
his absence, Khadija gave birth alone, without his presence or support.
Eventually, he sent her a text message stating “Na sake ki” (I divorce you).
Since then, he has never checked on her or their child. The marriage lasted
just about a year, filled with abuse, deceit, and neglect.
Analysis
of Exophoric References
Personal
Exophora:
“Kabir” → central figure, consistently identified as the
abuser and deceiver.
“his
mum”, “his younger siblings”,
and “his two kids” → point to extended family pressures,
revealing polygamous traces in Kabir’s life.
“my
mum made me to accept him” →
underscores parental influence in Hausa marital choices.
Spatial
Exophora:
“borrowed
house”, “his mum’s one-bedroom”,
and “the newly rented house with only a mattress” → reference
shifting unstable spaces of habitation. Each location reflects loss,
instability, and deception.
“I
returned back to Gombe (Kwami)” →
signals return to natal home as final refuge.
Temporal
Exophora:
“one
faithful day things began to change” →
signals sudden shift in marital dynamics.
“within
a period of one year” → situates her
marriage as short-lived but filled with intense hardship.
4.4
Excerpt 4
The
“car” with tinted glass, where Hauwa saw evidence of another woman, is a
symbolic space that triggers the ultimate breakdown of trust.
Hauwa,
a 17-year-old bride, married Turaki, a 22-year-old man from a wealthy family.
Their marriage, initially celebrated as prestigious, soon became troubled due
to Turaki’s frequent late-night outings and indulgence in parties. Hauwa often
stayed awake waiting for him, which led to quarrels. Despite periodic
reconciliations facilitated by parents, the marriage remained unstable. Matters
worsened when Turaki’s interactions with women became visible, culminating in
him bringing a lady into their compound, which Hauwa discovered. Turaki’s
mother frequently intervened in disputes, but her involvement often reinforced
rather than resolved tensions. Eventually, Hauwa left her husband’s house after
repeated neglect, especially his failure to provide for their daughter. The
marriage ended in divorce, which Hauwa herself requested, framing it as a
relief rather than a tragedy.
Exophoric
References
Personal
Exophoric References
Hauwa’s
use of “my husband,” “my father,” “his mother,” “my aunty” shows
reliance on key figures outside the immediate text. These references anchor her
narrative in recognizable social relations.
By
repeatedly invoking her father’s advice (“don’t you have a house?”),
Hauwa shifts authority from her own decision to parental wisdom, legitimizing
her actions.
References
to Turaki’s mother also highlight the cultural role of in-laws in mediating
marital conflict.
Spatial
Exophoric References
Spaces
such as “my parents’ house,” “our house,” “the compound” serve
as markers of marital stability and instability. Returning to her parents’
house repeatedly underscores cycles of conflict and reconciliation.
The
“car” with tinted glass, where Hauwa saw evidence of another woman, is a
symbolic space that triggers the ultimate breakdown of trust.
Temporal
Exophoric References
Phrases
such as “after four years,” “one faithful day,” “after I left” situate
her narrative in a chronological framework. These temporal anchors highlight
the gradual accumulation of grievances rather than a single incident of rupture.
References
to “early in the morning,” “from 12 am to 3 am,” “Sallah period” emphasize
moments of tension or neglect tied to specific times.
Hauwa’s
interview illustrates how exophoric references to people, spaces, times, and
events are mobilized to narrate the instability of marriage, the burden of
gendered neglect, and ultimately the agency of a woman who chooses separation.
4.5
Except 5
The “neighbor’s
house” becomes a site of refuge and intervention, reinforcing communal
surveillance over private relationships.
Aisha,
from Kwami, recounts her troubled marriage to Sadiq, a soldier based in
Maiduguri. The marriage began with deception—Sadiq neither attended the wedding
ceremony nor provided the expected items, leaving Aisha’s father to enforce his
duty of taking his bride. Soon after moving to Abuja, Aisha experienced neglect
and financial hardship, with her husband providing minimal support and lying
about salary issues. Neighbors, particularly BabanArfah, often
intervened by buying food or mediating between the couple.
Sadiq’s
reckless borrowing habits, suspected theft, and eventual abandonment deepened
the instability. He divorced Aisha via SMS, forcing her to seek support from
others to return to Gombe. Further revelations, such as Sadiq’s strained
relationship with his parents, reliance on lies, and suspected homosexuality,
shaped Aisha’s narrative of betrayal. Ultimately, she expressed relief at
leaving the marriage, thankful that no children were involved.
Exophoric
References
Personal
Exophoric References
Frequent
references to “my father,” “my husband,” “BabanArfah,” “Abdullahi,”
“his boss,” “his mother,” “his father” show how Aisha frames her story
around key individuals outside her immediate speech.
Her
father and the neighbor emerge as moral and social anchors, legitimizing her
choices and highlighting the communal nature of marriage dissolution in Hausa
society.
References
to Sadiq’s parents reveal intergenerational tensions and the cultural
expectation that family should play a stabilizing role.
Spatial
Exophoric References
Spaces
such as “Abuja,” “Maiduguri,” “Gombe,” “the barracks,” “my parents’
house” signal the geographical dislocations of military marriages. The
physical distance between spouses mirrors emotional distance.
The “neighbor’s
house” becomes a site of refuge and intervention, reinforcing communal
surveillance over private relationships.
Temporal
Exophoric References
Mentions
of “the day I came to Abuja,” “few days later,” “early in the morning,”
“the following morning” place her narrative within a precise temporal
rhythm that emphasizes repeated crises.
The
sequencing of lies, borrowings, and divorce messages highlights a cumulative
build-up of disappointment rather than a sudden breakdown.
Aisha’s
account demonstrates how exophoric references—to family, community, places, and
key events—help structure her narrative of marital betrayal and relief. The
story emphasizes deception, neglect, and communal intervention, highlighting
the intersection of gender, culture, and religion in shaping women’s divorce
experiences in Kwami.
4.6
Except 6
“Adamu” (ex-husband), “the young girls” (neighbors), “Zulaiha” (new
wife), “my grandmother and elder brother”, and “my younger
siblings” serve as reference points shaping her narrative.
Hauwa,
popularly known as “Mommy,” married Adamu in Bojude, Kwami LGA, in December
2022. She described the early stages of her marriage as happy and fulfilling,
with mutual love and support. Adamu was caring, provided for the household, and
even assisted with chores. However, tension arose due to Hauwa’s habit of
entertaining neighborhood girls in her home, which Adamu disapproved of.
Conflict
escalated when Hauwa, while pregnant, failed to keep the house tidy during
Adamu’s absence. Upon his return, a heated exchange occurred in which Hauwa
admitted saying words she later regretted. Adamu eventually married another
woman (his friend’s sister, Zulaiha) and accused Hauwa of being impatient and
dirty. Shortly after she gave birth, he divorced her.
Now
divorced with a son, Hauwa struggles with widowhood (zamanzawarci). She
faces disrespect from her family, insults from her grandmother and elder
brother, and rejection from suitors unwilling to marry a woman with a child.
Despite these hardships, she appreciates Adamu’s monthly child support and
supplements her income by selling groundnut oil. She expresses a desire to
remarry, correct her past mistakes, and restore her dignity.
Exophoric
References
Personal
Exophoric References
“Adamu” (ex-husband), “the young girls” (neighbors), “Zulaiha” (new
wife), “my grandmother and elder brother”, and “my younger
siblings” serve as reference points shaping her narrative.
These
external figures embody different social pressures: the husband as provider and
disciplinarian, neighbors as a source of conflict, and family as a site of
stigma.
Spatial
Exophoric References
Mentions
of “Bojude,” “Bauchi,” “my parents’ house,” and “my
husband’s house” highlight the shifting spaces that define her married
and divorced life.
The
contrast between her former home with Adamu (initially safe and loving) and her
father’s house (marked by stigma and neglect) underscores the challenges
divorced women face in returning to natal homes.
Temporal
Exophoric References
Specific
dates (“24/December/2022” to “5/January/2025”) situate the short-lived
marriage in a precise time frame.
References
to stages like pregnancy, delivery, arbain (40-day postpartum period),
and monthly feeding allowance reflect cultural and biological markers
of marital and post-marital life.
5.
Conclusion
The
six interviews responds conducted with divorced women in Kwami provide rich
insights into how exophoric references are used to narrate, interpret, and
negotiate the experiences of marital breakdown. The findings show that an
exophoric referencing is not merely a linguistic phenomenon but a deeply
cultural and pragmatic resource. Through exophora, divorced women in Kwami
anchor their personal narratives in shared religious, cultural, and communal
frameworks, simultaneously legitimizing their voices and navigating the stigma
of marital dissolution.
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